CAN

Today I did my weekly weigh in at my WW meeting.  I haven't been this high in so long and it is trying to send me on a spiral downward. 

My goal for this day, yes one day at a time right now, is:

• to track my food
• eat better
• 30 mins of activity (which will probably be cleaning the house)

I bought a journal and a 3 ring binder today (so I can keep all my recipes or motivational articles in one place).  I still plan on blogging but I thought maybe the journal would help get the thoughts out of my head as they happen, rather than waiting to write an entire blog.  Also, I could add recipes I come across or good websites to check out.  It will be a resource as well.

I titled this blog "CAN" because that is what I need to think right now.

• I CAN be happy.
• I CAN track.
• I CAN check points plus values on food.
• I CAN get exercise in regularly.
• I CAN make time for me.
• I CAN make time for my family.

I am sure there are more and I will work on adding to this list as I think of them.  Right now I need to focus my energy and the positives in my life and learn how to deal with the negatives better.  I really have no idea how to do this, but I know I HAVE TO TRY!

Life is definitely not easy and right now I feel like I am failing, but I am DETERMINED as well to NOT GIVE UP.  I can't let these negative feelings win.  I need to find my happy self.  The one that loves her body no matter what a scale says.  I need to feel successful again and right now I have been fighting with it a lot. 

I have been getting really good at faking it and that IS NOT WORKING!  I must change this. 

• Scratch that - I CAN CHANGE THIS. 
• I don't know how exactly yet, but I am starting with today and will take it one day at a time!

Thank you for taking the time to read this and help me with this journey.  Even just knowing it is getting read and that I am sharing my feelings helps me too!

If you have any suggestions to try I welcome ideas.  I will keep you posted on my progress.

~Chat Soon~